Showing posts with label personal space. Show all posts
Showing posts with label personal space. Show all posts

Thursday, December 22, 2011

What's the Small Stuff?

As I sat at a stop light on a multi-lane road, the light changed from red to green. A millisecond later, one driver beeped the car horn. Was that for me? What’d I do wrong? That’s what I would have thought years ago when I first started driving. Back then a parallel parking spot used to send me hunting for a “regular” space. Okay, it still does. But the point is now, with years of experience under my belt, whenever I hear a car horn beep while I’m driving, I think, “Hold your horses. You should’ve left home earlier!”   
If you talk with anyone sixty years and older, I believe they’ll tell you that the things they worried about decades ago pale in comparison to the issues that occupy their thoughts today. It’s interesting how knowledge and experience change our perspectives. Sometimes it’s a matter of focusing on the big picture.
One of our kids chose to replicate Neptune for a science project, and I learned that it’s approximately seventeen times the earth’s mass. I’m always fascinated by the solar system and our position in it. We always seem to discover something new things in space. This video provides us with a fresh perspective on life and our universe:

If you’re feeling insignificant, be encouraged! Despite the minuscule blip of space we occupy in the universe, we still have big jobs to tackle, like creating lasting legacies through parenting, teaching and role modeling. As you pass on the wisdom you’ve learned over the years, what small stuff would you advise a young adult not to sweat?        

Friday, October 7, 2011

Too Close! Too Close!!

Do you know anyone who might be classified as a hugger? Whenever you see them, you know they’re going to greet you with a big, warm hug. Then there’s the other group of people who feel a nice smile or a firm handshake is warm enough. I started out in the handshake/you’re-too-close club and eventually joined the hug club. Now I’m much more comfortable sharing my personal space, although depending on mood and circumstance, I can easily slip back into the you're-too-close club.  
I’ll give you an example. One time Terry,* a family friend, patted my pregnant belly, so I reciprocated. Surprise! Terry wasn’t expecting to get a belly-pat back, but that small gesture spoke volumes, in a humorous way. It said, “No touching the big belly, babe!” Beyond hugs or handshakes, wouldn’t most casual friends or acquaintances touch your arm or maybe your shoulder? So why do people see pregnancy as an open invitation to rub the big belly?
The rules for personal space vary by person and by culture. If you require a lot of personal space, big cities like NYC, will test your tolerance. In crowded NY subway cars strangers regularly squash up against strangers, and in parts of Japan, I hear they’re considering female-only sections on trains. Not a bad idea.
If you’ve ever had a too-close-for-your-comfort encounter where someone exceeded the unwritten rules for personal space, you’ll sympathize with these patrons:


As long as belly-rubbers pair up with natural huggers, everybody’s comfortable. When you’re forced to step beyond your comfort zone, how do you distinguish between a stretched comfort zone and compromise?     
      
*fictitious name