The Alarming Situation

It is official. Autumn is here and you know what that means. Every morning’s chilly and grey skies start our days. Bliss is lying in bed under the warm covers minutes before the alarm clock rings. But, if you have to get up, you’ll need all your strength to push back the blankets and roll out of bed. Fall makes getting up especially hard and the Battle of the Sheets isn’t an easy victory. Of course, we offer a good fight by hitting the snooze button (several times) and vowing to get up in “two more minutes.” Kids and pets can be great motivators to drag us out of bed, but if you rise first in your home or live alone—good luck!

Many of us use some type of gadget to wake up, but those obnoxious alarm clocks fail to offer the real encouragement we need. Most alarm clocks lack pizzazz. Here’s a guy who donned his thinking cap and got creative:

                                          http://youtu.be/kQ-l5PlDa-k

If I had an alarm clock like that one, I’d have to blame my tardiness on something besides oversleeping. I could blame it on the concussion I would surely get from using that contraption. Barring extreme alarm clocks, what makes you leap out of bed, eager to start a new day?     

The Dirty Truth

What do I dislike about housework? I’d say it’s the repetition. If the kitchen looks clean and the floor sparkles, turn your back to clean something else and within moments you’ll have a water-plashed sink and crumb-covered floors.  We should put a moratorium on our house. I’ll clean it from top to bottom and we’ll live elsewhere for several days. If you see the trees draped with yellow caution tape and a sign stuck to the front door that says: Just Cleaned! – Do Not Enter,  you’ll know what happened.

Not long ago my dear child watched as I emptied the dishwasher for what felt like the fiftieth time that day. My heart-warming moment came when I heard the precious words every mother longs to hear. I translated it as, “Mom, you’re so wonderful and I’m so grateful for all the hard work you do in our home.” In fact, the actual words were, “I feel bad for you.” I’ll accept that. Face it, we love to put our own spin on situations. Look at what happened in Texas:

                                       http://youtu.be/emPPKjyU_NI

The sign hackers thought their prank was funny, but local officials saw it as a public hazard.  It’s amazing how people can experience identical circumstances and arrive at totally different conclusions. For instance, consider the anchorwoman who responded on air to an email that criticized her appearance. When viewers commented, one person applauded
(yes!) the anchorwoman’s response, while another person called it “whiny.” What surprising comments have you heard in response to seemingly harmless statements or situations?    

Bacon Shortage?

News reports indicate next year’s high corn costs will result in limited supplies of pig food and a (gasp!) bacon shortage. I don’t know how to break the news to our kids. They love bacon enough to eat it every day. As a youngster, I remember cooking bacon and picking off the fat so that only the meat remained. I wasn’t much of a BLT-eater, but I liked bacon and cheese sandwiches, with my wee bits of lean bacon scattered across the bread. If there is a bacon shortage next year and you start craving fried pork, here’s one solution to help you make it through the day:

                               http://youtu.be/eN0hNvpDvuI

Does it get any better than meat perfume for $36? I’m sure someone has already bought it as a pricey joke. I’d like to smell the perfume, perhaps I’ll buy some if the price drops. Let’s hope people get their share of bacon next year, otherwise the shortage might spawn a whole, new wave of pork-related merchandise to boost the GNP. High prices and damaging weather conditions cause shortages in everything from vegetable to meats. In your opinion, what other types of shortages exist? What else does society lack?       

Having It All

Here’s a name that grabs attention—Honey Boo Boo. No doubt you know about the little pageant girl whose family stars in a TV reality show. Despite how you feel about the show, I think Honey Boo Boo’s mama, June Shannon, is a survivor and one shrewd woman. She’s a dumpster diver and an extreme couponer who brings her kids on her adventures and passes along her skills. When the freight train chugs past their house, don’t be surprised if Ms. Shannon jumps on board and rides it straight to the bank. We may not agree with everything she does, but I commend her for providing for her family. If we look beyond the family and pageantry dynamics, I suspect we’ll discover that June Shannon has a deeper story to tell, one that would inspire the wealthy and the poor.

While most discussions about the American Dream focus on upward financial mobility, the road to financial prosperity includes sacrifices and concessions. Here’s a guy who weighed the costs and decided that he’s content right where he is. Does he have it all?  See what you think:                     

                                    http://youtu.be/kfF7Se-nkHk

Clearly, not all of us want or need the house with the white picket fence. Our level of contentment has a lot to do with self-image and values. Excluding money, what else factors into your vision of the American Dream?

Nothing’s Wrong with Curly Fries

Have you listened to kids sing songs? It’s funny when they make up phrases and change the lyrics to whatever the words sound like to them. Adults do it, too and unless someone corrects us, we’ll continue singing nonsense for years. There’s a gospel song on the radio by Mary Mary called “Go Get It.” When my kids hear it, they’ll sing the right words until they get to the song’s bridge. Now the real lyrics include the words “qualified, mercy multiplied and certified.” For some reason, my kids insert “curly, swirly fries.” How does food make sense in the context of that song? Oh sure, people can have strong cravings for a good basket of curly fries, but I doubt that has anything to do with the “go get it” in this song.  

Twenty years ago the distinction between right and wrong felt as unmistakable as the difference between black and white. With our changing societal norms, grey is the new black and white and  the culture is redefining the rules of ethical behavior. Maybe that’s why people respond like this when asked about values and ethics:        

                                       http://youtu.be/ZIaHxC7BT0A

In last week’s post, I asked you what kids should learn in school. I’d put critical thinking skills on the list because it’s never too early to learn to defend our views of right vs. wrong. Regardless of how our culture changes, what’s the one thing everyone will always believe is right?      

Supply-Side Education

It’s back-to-school shopping time again. This is the season in which we endure or enjoy the hustle and bustle of checking the supplies list and running from store to store for the best deals as the cash flows from our pockets. If you have children, you can identify with this scenario. If not, you get to enjoy the benefits of office supply sales. When you’re in stores this week, take advantage of the remaining back-to-school sales. Great deals exist and some items will only cost a penny. You’re going to need pens, paper, folders or notepads at some point so you may as well load up your shopping cart. Flexible rulers make great Christmas gifts, don’t they?    

My informal research indicates that kids fall into two camps: those who are ready to return to school and the other half—not so much. Our kids fall into the not-so-much camp. Despite their initial reluctance, I hope all kids enjoy a year full of new possibilities and achievements. Listen to how one school flips the script:

                          http://youtu.be/5BTRk7yMmdA

 The students appear excited about the new home and class routine.  It seems like a simple, inexpensive plan. Let’s hope test scores rise and the students learn a lot. In your opinion, what’s the main thing kids need to learn in their schools this year?

A Big Tail of Terror

Fishing is such a relaxing family pastime. We went out to the lake a couple of weeks ago. The water flowed along, interrupted only by an occasional boater or a duck. Of course, one of our kids beckoned the ducks with quacking sounds and then exclaimed, “I am the Duck Whisperer!”  I spent the time relaxing in the gentle breeze, swatting away flying critters, and cringing at  comments about the nightcrawlers’ “blue veins” and their “gooey, white hearts” as the poor worms were ripped apart, speared and hooked for bait. Yuk! It was a worm’s worst nightmare.

I’m guessing few people associate relaxing lake fishing with violence. Once you combine worm gore and fish blood, you have a really messy event and so I bring plenty of hand sanitizer. I doled out some sanitizer after the worm tearing and more after tossing back the catch. I won’t bore you with the measurements of the four fish we caught, but let’s just say several spanned the width of a hand. We’ll skip the tales about the “big ones that got away.” When you catch the really big ones, you better get proof and here’s a guy who does:

                              http://youtu.be/lcJovDMSp1A 

Jeremy Wade catches the scary fish, the ones you don’t want to know exist, especially if you‘re vacationing in an exotic place because that’s where they seem to lurk. The various kinds of fish  in our waters rivals the types of cereals on our supermarket shelves. Why so many?  I have a few fish favorites. Check out two of them:   One fish          Two fish 

In your opinion, why are there so many interesting and unusual species of fish?